Even if we can’t find heaven, I’ll walk through Hell with you.

I have been engaged to F for almost a month now and it’s been great! My family and friends were surprisingly supportive of this engagement which i didn’t expect to be honest. I thought there would be some serious drama like “nak tunang pun nak sembunyikan, kata sedara” or “mana nak jemput” but…… there was none. So, alhamdulilah.

I still caught myself smiling and am extremely proud when I look at my beautiful ring that sits perfectly on my right ring finger ever since. I am still trying to get used to calling Faris my fiance! Ceh! Hahaha. Every single time I mention “matair aku…..” there will always be someone correcting me hahaha.

Now to the bummer: The fact that we only have like 17 months left, plus we recently (not really actually) got into a bike accident, Faris haven’t been riding for months because of his broken thumb.




We instantly shrunk because of loss of appetite. So no bike, our self-esteem were also affected surprisingly, how bad can it get? Yes, some may advise us to travel by public and all. In all honesty, I respect each and everyone’s different views and opinions but, bike. is. still. very. important. for. us. Now especially. Even before all this wedding preps, Faris was already planning to take up a part-time job as a rider for additional income. Why not? Tapi memandangkan sekarang dah takda motor, macam mana nak kerja part-time. It’s abit worrying because money is, again, an issue here. Weddings are expensive especially when we have not much time left? How is that possible? At this moment, it seems to be an incredibly large amount of effort and planning and work and money of course hahaha to get this wedding done. How is that possible and how other couples able to do it?

But on the bright side…..

I’m just looking forward to the wedding and marriage itself. Spending the rest of my life with Faris is the best reward possible and I’m willing to put all my effort into this. In Shaa Allah we can do this together!

Wish me luck!

Happy 26th my Chinaman.

Dear Faris,

As soon as I met you, I knew that you were someone truly special. You were everything I wanted and I couldn’t help but be drawn to you. Never in a million years would I guessed that now, after all these time, you would mean so much to me.

The funny thing was, I wasn’t looking for you. I found you. Out of funny circumstances and total coincidence.  I want you to know that I am extremely glad that you stumbled into my life and became a very big part of it. There are so many wonderful things to thank you for that I don’t even know where do I begin…oh yes, firstly, happy birthday dear.

Words will never do justice but I can try right?

  1. Thank you for putting me in place.
    Especially when my temper gets the best of me :<
  2. Thank you for knowing how to handle me.
    And doing an excellent job of it. I know I am not always the easiest person to deal with, but you settled me down and in the end, always made me smile in a way no one else can.
  3. Thank you for being serious. 
    Despite our silliness, you know exactly when to put on the serious-caring boyfriend pant. You’ve been right by my side through some of the toughest experience in my life and you’ve never once faltered. I am incredibly grateful for your unconditional support and love even in the face of difficulty.
  4. Thank you for making me so happy and humbled.
    There are days that i just sit and look at you and wonder how I get so lucky. Sometimes, i feel that I don’t deserve someone as wonderful as you. Your passion for helping others, being kind and making everyone around you smile is something that I will always be amazed by you. You inspire me every single day and i feel absolutely blessed to be part of your life. You changed me to a better version of myself and always encourage me to strive for the best.

We have had the most amazing journey so far. We’ve had times where we can laugh until all hours of the night, cry on each others shoulders, and sit without saying anything at all. I can never imagine my life without you. You are always there for me when others aren’t. You always tell me the truth even when it hurts. You love my family as much as your own. You cherish your friendships and I love that. And you definitely make the world a better place.

I love you more and more with every day that goes by. I am so blessed that God created you just for me and that I found you. To many more birthday celebrations together and grow old in each others arms. I love you sweetheart and I hope that you have a very wonderful day today! Happy 26th Birthday sayang!!!

Love you always and forever,

The Engagement.

Some may think I am too young for this, some may think I should know F more before proceeding with the engagement, worst, some may even think F is just a rebound. Crap. 🙂 I’ve always known there was a reason god put you in my life. Though we knew each other for less than a year, Alhamdulilah now we’re engaged.

Initially we plan to make it on 24th July since both of us think that 24 is our lucky number. In fact we want everything to be on the 24th! :B Coincidentally F’s family is coming over today for raya visiting so………. both our parents thought it’s best to sarung cincin, might as well they say. It was so last min, I can’t even plot my leave request. But syukuran i’m glad it happened. Small and intimate just like how I always wished for.

Dulang? No dulangs just bakul Hehehehe. We exchange rings, I gave him his favourite Prima Deli cake as a little gift whilst his side prepared a basket full of chocolates for me!

We didn’t have a  list of people to invite though. Just his family and his aunty&uncle (as wakil), my family and also my atuk sedara (and family of 4, as wakil too) only because they have no experience at the whole engagement thing.

No makeup artist/freelance makeup artist. Just me and my asal-boleh makeup skills hahaha.

Engagement dress? Recycled my ASOS peachy lace dress.

As you can see below, my muka awkward gila seh. Duh!!! I can’t even stand or stay still to take an ootd especially when you know there is people watching you (!!!!!) what’s more sitting on the chair, having the limelightsurround by your in-laws hahahah! Aiyo my self-esteem i tell you, down the drain.




My all.
Since Am couldn’t reach home on time due to his match, i just had to!
Bakal Mertuaku hehehehe
F’s siblings.
My atuk Nash and family, Ibu, nenek, and Tassha.
Kejong sekejap jari.


So kenkawan, In Shaa Allah kalau tak ada halangan, kami akan langsungkan majlis tahun depan. Doakan yang terbaik untuk kita dua ye?